To the public: In order to avoid any misunderstanding, I wish to announce that I do not appear in this picture. It is the first serious drama written and directed by myself.1

Empty stage. Woman sitting on the floor, in the middle. Man enters left, approaches the woman, stops in front of her. She does not notice. Silence. Man walks to the right; about to exit, stops and turns back.
+ Is there anything I can do?
* (As if realized his existence long ago.) Well, not much, but you could try.
+ Tell me.
* Do not hesitate to improvise.
+ Is that it?
* No.
+ So?
* I guess there isn't anything you can do.
+ I really wanted to make a change.
* Maybe next time.
+ Which next time?
* Well, in general.
+ (Confused.) I'm not following.
* Exactly!
+ Is there anything you can do?
* Well, not much, but I could try.
+ Would you?
* Maybe next time.
+ This is becoming significantly disturbing.
* Which?
+ In general.
* I see.
Silence. Man reluctantly approaches the woman.
+ For as long as I've known myself, …
* Some fifteen minutes, that is?
+ Does it matter?
* Not much.
+ May I continue?
* You could try.
+ What was I saying?
* Exactly!
Silence. Man walks towards the woman. They look at each other. Long silence.
+ Is there a way out?
* (Surprised) Is there a way in?
+ Not that I am aware of.
* There you are.
+ I am about to give up.
Silence. Man leaves, re-enters, walks to the other side of the stage, leaves, re-enters, stops in front of the woman. She does not notice.
+ Is there anything I can do?

1 A Woman of Paris by Charles Chaplin. Chaplin's personal preface in the beginning of the movie.

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